the beetle
the beetle is strong and has the confidence like any other beetle would have. the beetle enjoys company with other insects such as the praying mantis and also the ladybug. He has so much friends that sometimes he totally forgot who's his real friends is
.
Thursday, May 08, 2003
stick
the stick is just a stick to me. But after gaining recognition and status then he has the power. He is actually good at heart but still he is the leader of the group of beetles.
The beetle follows stick's orders faithfully. The beetle has to swallow down any pride that the beetle has to meet the requirements of being in the tribe.
the stick is being kinda strict. He only knows the ways to instruct as would a stick does. He has been trained that way since he was still a bud of fresh leaf.
the stick is just a stick to me. But after gaining recognition and status then he has the power. He is actually good at heart but still he is the leader of the group of beetles.
The beetle follows stick's orders faithfully. The beetle has to swallow down any pride that the beetle has to meet the requirements of being in the tribe.
the stick is being kinda strict. He only knows the ways to instruct as would a stick does. He has been trained that way since he was still a bud of fresh leaf.
slave
A slave is just a dead body given life. It cannot fuly utilise the worthiness of its life. When a slave has gained a lot from its experiences carrying out daily life then the memory takes its toll.
The slave was given a task. It will be paid handsomely if he would able to do it properly and he is given the freedom of doing it in his own time.
* There comes a time when the slave was captured on film doing his work.When a picture is taken its only verifies that the slave is only a dead body trying to fulfill its owner's tasks. He has no source of happiness. He only lives day by day. Dreaming his owners dream.
A slave is just a dead body given life. It cannot fuly utilise the worthiness of its life. When a slave has gained a lot from its experiences carrying out daily life then the memory takes its toll.
The slave was given a task. It will be paid handsomely if he would able to do it properly and he is given the freedom of doing it in his own time.
* There comes a time when the slave was captured on film doing his work.When a picture is taken its only verifies that the slave is only a dead body trying to fulfill its owner's tasks. He has no source of happiness. He only lives day by day. Dreaming his owners dream.
the case of the stick and the slave
A stick is just a stick. Nothing more than that. But when the stick has gained recognition from a reputable sources of study then the stick has gained more than its worth.
To me a stick is just a stick and worth nothing more than that
A slave is only so humble that it cannot recognize more than its worth. The slave has been criticized.
A stick is just a stick. Nothing more than that. But when the stick has gained recognition from a reputable sources of study then the stick has gained more than its worth.
To me a stick is just a stick and worth nothing more than that
A slave is only so humble that it cannot recognize more than its worth. The slave has been criticized.
Wednesday, April 23, 2003
Scientific Expedition 2003
on a wednesday morning 09.4.03
we rode a bus to langkawi. i was seated next to faizul and ridzuan was seated next to dr amir
we arrived at kuala kedah at around 3.00 and at 3.00 we went aboard a ferry which took us a bout a vcd of (the sixth day starring Arnold Swarzenegger).
we arrived at Mutiara Burau Bay Resort at around 7.00..and thus they said its a 12 hour journey
on a thursday morning 10.04.03
it was the lauching of The Scientific and Heritage Expedition Langkawi at 10 am this morning, by the kedah State EXCO for Culture, Arts and Tourism. This event marks the flag off for 37 scientific teams into the various parts of Langkawi.
on a friday morning 11.04.03
i was grouped with dr norlida and her fungi group.
we went to Sg. Sireh
i went to friday prayers with dr
on a saturday morning 12.04.03
we went along the ride although the dr had to leave us.
i went along with dr norlida and faizul to Datai
nice waterfall.
Along came the reporters.
it was a sunday 14.04.03
we went along dr norlidah to the foot of gunung raya
it was the steps of tangga seribu kenangan
only climbed about
ridzuan and faizol and me went up the Gunung macincang using a cable car
it was faizul's last day
on a monday13.04.03
faizul had to leave to make way for the second group
we sent our friends back and we rented a motorbike
a briefing was done
on a tuesday 14.04.03
the new group
Friday, April 04, 2003
Monday, March 10, 2003
Tuesday, February 18, 2003
today I've just watched survivor six: Amazon debut today..lot s of comments
well actually they divided the tribes differently this time, jaburu and tambiqui something..into same sex tribe the male tribe tambiqui (after a fish) and jaburu after a bird..and this makes it interesting
who would have thought that the girls would or even could win the first time! it was so shocking and so funny..the fault lies with Ryan and Daniel Lieu crawling upon a horizontal pole trying (embarrassingly) to balance themselves to the other side..those two should have been blamed..
the girls, the girls beautiful girl Heidi..the girl group was actually trying to give up when they couldn't solve the first puzzle. they just gave up..but then came the two stooges Ryan and Daniel ..crawling wiggling sliding..and still after numerous attempts couldn't get through..so funny
the girls..boiling underwear in the pot..so funny..and the girls afraid of spider..and i thought i saw the flour get moldy..and the girls couldn't even start a fire properly and only did so after 6 hours..(and i imagine they'llget wet if it rains)
compared to the guys..there was a war vet in the group ..how lucky they was..and the leader a headmaster always directing the school boys happily.it seems that the war vet ..was giving too much orders and making the tribe members (some of them) really annoyed. (something is wrong with the rapport).I really liked the senior headmaster..he was addressing and instructing politely and saying the magic word please..the boys seemed to like it.
It was strange the testosteron didnt clash at all.it went so well nobody tried to you know boss around except for the war vet..
and the moment they started talking about getting it on with the girls ..i was kinda blurr for a while then rob said that heidi was the most beautiful chick around and needs no viagra for it..then i started to realize that heidi was ..yes the most beautifull.blonde haired..small framed..kinda lay low and fit
and also maybe just maybe fit for me.and the guys ..hmm so far i find that alex the triathlathon ..the attractive one..
.well its just for starters..its only been like three days..and i imagined rob the kinda nerd and unfit and unattractive would've been like shoved aside..but still he has that quality that makes him heard..hmm i don't know..
and Daniel and Ryan was so close like airheads together..yeah dude..and Daniel is an accountant (that didn't make sense at all) it didn't fit the equation.
the rocket scientist let off some steam today..about lying..(Big Deal..)
and the clever rocket scientist and the computer whiz cant even solve a piece puzzle..(sadly strange...maybe the computer got hanged)
i have to say , the shack that they made..wow it was awesome (thanks to the war vet) and i guess it was the bestest camp Survivor ever made..and how i wish i could've find a way to make that..it might be useful to me someday.really guys, its the best ever on survivor and i guess like it can last a year or so..so robust and long lasting..
tribal council
(it was clever for daniel to quickly admit his wrong cause this would favor some hearts from the tribe) and ryan shouldn't have been so selfish to try to convince others to vote for Roger (the war vet).THAT STRATEGY NEVER HAD WORKED AND NEVER WILLWORK.ever.the lazy bums still ryan and daniel.Ryans an airhead cause hes a model and Daniel's an airhead and he's an accountant..that doestn't make sense..is this guy lying in his resume'?
all and all i still think the guys will win next time..who could've denied that..and the guys will win the overall imean most challenges except if the produces changes some of it to more mental challenges..
INTAN
i dont know how to put it actually, the 3 days in intan has always been and will always be the fondest, (presumably) or the hardest moment in my life..
It is actually, becoming something that you really are not. But the MAIN thing it is for the best of me..
the moment i got in there theres trouble, it actually started with my motorbike being stolen..then the registration became hard because i didnt have the form..But who cares (they didnt , as i found later)..they took my height and weight ..and walah..WELCOME TO INTAN..please enjoy your stay with us.
I almost cried when mum left..it's like me being in a prison or something..
But as far as it goes, all went well..and i like it..
My room mates are superb..and okay..no problems of vanity or complications as before..they are rooted to the ground as possible..
Being in INTAN reminded me of being in MEDICAL school..the tension bening among the best and trying to prove yourself always..
and when the exercises are over i felt fatigue as hell..luckily the room was SO SO SO comfortable..the mattress was double, the food was FREE and also So good..
I met alot of other university students from all over KL..and i met some of my friends ex-victorian..okaylah, they arent arrogant at all..
We were tested of our communication skills mainly, the first thought when i joined the group (ours was group 10, there are 11 of us, out of 114)..was i cant wait for the public speaking, knowing that i had prepared..and YES it WENT WELL actually it went SUPERB if i may say so myself..
the group activity started at night 8.30 after our dinner.
PENYELESAIAN MASALAHGroup 10 yes that was us, we started with the kones, 10, 5gold,5silver..we had to arrange it to pairs..each only moving 2 and it had to be in 7 takes or less..so we didnt do it..but i was so loud..(it was at this point that i hated S because he just wanted to be a leader but its not like he know anything..cause he knows nothing at the time still blur but still he wanted to be the leader..what i had to say is its always like that with akkk..(hmmph!)
then
the hullahoops..6..and had to make a circle..well i was quite loud at that time and first time i, no we did it..yess! :)
then the cones had to be in 5 rows, 6 cones in each row..we did it but En ZUl rejected..still we got the 2nd one..alhamdulillah..
the second day..
PROBLEM Solving..
paku paku..angels ..what ever blah balh..then case study..Margaret Schmaker something...being the problem..in processing..then its over..cause they give a break to prepare for public speaking and pengucapan awam..
there was negotiation..buying system barter ..
The 3rd day
(hairan kenapa the translations of that went terrible..Pengucapan awam..I was so ...angry..and did i tell you that i threw up before the session starts..it was a mix of french toast with strawberry jam and coffee..i dont know it started with coughing then ended with puking..
do you know something, people was actually AWED by me ,the puny little me..that i always, and I repeat i always made people think that i am SMART..imagine when i wanted to start pengucapan awam..people stared at me..literally gasped..as though i was some sort of (i dont know..)..just a second before that ..just a while they were laughing..of some sort..so
so when people gasped..so did i..i panicked..everything that i had..i just FORGET..and i was making sentences end..it was so terrible..and that was in malay..and im a malay..so sad..(kelakar jugak)
but the Public speaking went well..we were lucky our group was called first..it started with number 113. then i went out number 114.. i didnt even think..when i started seeing people's serious faces, i make no notice...and i just go on..and on...and on..and on..i wasnt thinking anything at all..(once i smiled) ..then..i said thank you..WOW its over already..my hell in INTAN is finally over..I really had to praise En Zulkefli because he was so thoughtful enough to call the NERVOUS ones first..in order to lessen their burden..En Zul i really respect you..so thoughful..of you..l
i dont know how to put it actually, the 3 days in intan has always been and will always be the fondest, (presumably) or the hardest moment in my life..
It is actually, becoming something that you really are not. But the MAIN thing it is for the best of me..
the moment i got in there theres trouble, it actually started with my motorbike being stolen..then the registration became hard because i didnt have the form..But who cares (they didnt , as i found later)..they took my height and weight ..and walah..WELCOME TO INTAN..please enjoy your stay with us.
I almost cried when mum left..it's like me being in a prison or something..
But as far as it goes, all went well..and i like it..
My room mates are superb..and okay..no problems of vanity or complications as before..they are rooted to the ground as possible..
Being in INTAN reminded me of being in MEDICAL school..the tension bening among the best and trying to prove yourself always..
and when the exercises are over i felt fatigue as hell..luckily the room was SO SO SO comfortable..the mattress was double, the food was FREE and also So good..
I met alot of other university students from all over KL..and i met some of my friends ex-victorian..okaylah, they arent arrogant at all..
We were tested of our communication skills mainly, the first thought when i joined the group (ours was group 10, there are 11 of us, out of 114)..was i cant wait for the public speaking, knowing that i had prepared..and YES it WENT WELL actually it went SUPERB if i may say so myself..
the group activity started at night 8.30 after our dinner.
PENYELESAIAN MASALAHGroup 10 yes that was us, we started with the kones, 10, 5gold,5silver..we had to arrange it to pairs..each only moving 2 and it had to be in 7 takes or less..so we didnt do it..but i was so loud..(it was at this point that i hated S because he just wanted to be a leader but its not like he know anything..cause he knows nothing at the time still blur but still he wanted to be the leader..what i had to say is its always like that with akkk..(hmmph!)
then
the hullahoops..6..and had to make a circle..well i was quite loud at that time and first time i, no we did it..yess! :)
then the cones had to be in 5 rows, 6 cones in each row..we did it but En ZUl rejected..still we got the 2nd one..alhamdulillah..
the second day..
PROBLEM Solving..
paku paku..angels ..what ever blah balh..then case study..Margaret Schmaker something...being the problem..in processing..then its over..cause they give a break to prepare for public speaking and pengucapan awam..
there was negotiation..buying system barter ..
The 3rd day
(hairan kenapa the translations of that went terrible..Pengucapan awam..I was so ...angry..and did i tell you that i threw up before the session starts..it was a mix of french toast with strawberry jam and coffee..i dont know it started with coughing then ended with puking..
do you know something, people was actually AWED by me ,the puny little me..that i always, and I repeat i always made people think that i am SMART..imagine when i wanted to start pengucapan awam..people stared at me..literally gasped..as though i was some sort of (i dont know..)..just a second before that ..just a while they were laughing..of some sort..so
so when people gasped..so did i..i panicked..everything that i had..i just FORGET..and i was making sentences end..it was so terrible..and that was in malay..and im a malay..so sad..(kelakar jugak)
but the Public speaking went well..we were lucky our group was called first..it started with number 113. then i went out number 114.. i didnt even think..when i started seeing people's serious faces, i make no notice...and i just go on..and on...and on..and on..i wasnt thinking anything at all..(once i smiled) ..then..i said thank you..WOW its over already..my hell in INTAN is finally over..I really had to praise En Zulkefli because he was so thoughtful enough to call the NERVOUS ones first..in order to lessen their burden..En Zul i really respect you..so thoughful..of you..l
Saturday, January 25, 2003
STOLEN me after all of all its me.its so sad how can this be..i still cant imagine it happening to me..what did i do? what i didnt do right this time..must be the luhit.not only me it seems that granpas house was also burgled yesterday..tok chu found out on thursday maghrib..when he went to prayers..wan chik's house was also burgled..so sad
kish lost her sim card..i lost my hp and simcard.
I was so shocked so shocked.! I though it was a joke....my motorbike of all the things..my motorbike..i musta have been looking like a rich kid..i stuffed all my things inside the GIVI box, my wallet, hand phone, my bag, cd player..luckily i didnt bring all or much cd..just before that i bought the best of sting..anyways its fated already, still its so sad..
ive have been having this thoughts before this incident, happen that one day i'll go back to my motorbike and found that its gone.not once, not twice, more than that..so i ignored it..so what? well my motorbikes missing..and do you know how i felt? i felt emotionless..i cant believe its happening..no no someone must have been joking
i went to report at balai polis dang wangi near VI..just now..the robbery took place at 5.40 in the afternoon and i realized its missing at 6.40 ..so sad come to think about it..so sad..(so nicelah thing cranberries song)..
warning? premonitions? well ive had it around 3 months back..i remembered of thinking that something was about to happen to my motorbike if i didnt lock it properly..well i did lock it but still the keys are inside the GIVI box..so alas, the same thing still applies.
1.If iveknown this thing shouldve happened, then,the first thing id do is not to go jogging today..but ive ignored my hearts say today..concerning more on what my body might need..exercise..
then ive might just not leave home then, leave it alone..then
2.if ive known what might have happened, then, i'll bring the keys (my motorbike keys) with me ..cause ive seen people carrying, keys and hand phone with them while they went jogging..(i never thought much about it at all) cause it never occurred to me that this thing would happen..
3. Locked or not locked seem not to be the case because still i put all my keys inside the GIVI box..
4.Luhit being part of this ..of course..and maybe part of it maybe because i didnt follow my moms direction to pay the phone bills at titiwangsa? perhaps..who knows..Still i cant seem to feel that this is why this thing happen.(not weighted to this)
There must be some helluva lesson for me to learn and i need to figure it out..and most of all for every cloud theres a silver lining..perhaps..not perhaps for sure...
kish lost her sim card..i lost my hp and simcard.
I was so shocked so shocked.! I though it was a joke....my motorbike of all the things..my motorbike..i musta have been looking like a rich kid..i stuffed all my things inside the GIVI box, my wallet, hand phone, my bag, cd player..luckily i didnt bring all or much cd..just before that i bought the best of sting..anyways its fated already, still its so sad..
ive have been having this thoughts before this incident, happen that one day i'll go back to my motorbike and found that its gone.not once, not twice, more than that..so i ignored it..so what? well my motorbikes missing..and do you know how i felt? i felt emotionless..i cant believe its happening..no no someone must have been joking
i went to report at balai polis dang wangi near VI..just now..the robbery took place at 5.40 in the afternoon and i realized its missing at 6.40 ..so sad come to think about it..so sad..(so nicelah thing cranberries song)..
warning? premonitions? well ive had it around 3 months back..i remembered of thinking that something was about to happen to my motorbike if i didnt lock it properly..well i did lock it but still the keys are inside the GIVI box..so alas, the same thing still applies.
1.If iveknown this thing shouldve happened, then,the first thing id do is not to go jogging today..but ive ignored my hearts say today..concerning more on what my body might need..exercise..
then ive might just not leave home then, leave it alone..then
2.if ive known what might have happened, then, i'll bring the keys (my motorbike keys) with me ..cause ive seen people carrying, keys and hand phone with them while they went jogging..(i never thought much about it at all) cause it never occurred to me that this thing would happen..
3. Locked or not locked seem not to be the case because still i put all my keys inside the GIVI box..
4.Luhit being part of this ..of course..and maybe part of it maybe because i didnt follow my moms direction to pay the phone bills at titiwangsa? perhaps..who knows..Still i cant seem to feel that this is why this thing happen.(not weighted to this)
There must be some helluva lesson for me to learn and i need to figure it out..and most of all for every cloud theres a silver lining..perhaps..not perhaps for sure...
Thursday, January 23, 2003
Sweet Home Alabama
Well yesterday I watched Sweet Home Alabama.It was quite nice.The irritating part is that the screen wasnt clear enough.Some thing had to be done about the resolution.But nothing is done..So anyways I watched it with squinting eyes.So horrible..But still it was so nice and warm..and so southern ..
Yesterday i bought a flask for my bacteria collection.And I can't wait to show it to my supervisor, but he's not in yet now.
Well yesterday I watched Sweet Home Alabama.It was quite nice.The irritating part is that the screen wasnt clear enough.Some thing had to be done about the resolution.But nothing is done..So anyways I watched it with squinting eyes.So horrible..But still it was so nice and warm..and so southern ..
Yesterday i bought a flask for my bacteria collection.And I can't wait to show it to my supervisor, but he's not in yet now.
Wednesday, January 22, 2003
Tuesday, January 21, 2003
Good
Hello, and a very good morning to all.I came here earlier half hour..8.10 from home..8.45 arrived..New mood today. Why? maybe because of Ada Apa dengan cinta I watched yesterday.
Im back here in UM and Im kinda feeling happy.Well i should because i have spilt all my guts out in this blog ..and this blog has made me realize that how important it is to let yourself out and be heard..And i've read somewhere that it's good to have a diary just to keep track of whats going on..
Right now I'm still in the first month of my masters.and the application form has not been finalized by the senate but still i know i'm gonna make it. The saddest part is that..I'm not gonna be paid all this while waiting, untill I get my confirmation, then only I'll be given pay.It seems that all this while my colleages has been paid by the supervising lecturer.I wonder why I am not being paid..Hmm
Okay. about going to UK.Well you know, I go with tha flow,,da flow man..And it seems that now, the flow is very high..the currents is going against me.So I betta not go..Premonitions and all.Thats what I think.The thing with MARA being you have to pay and all.The thing is that I am even not qualified to get a MARA form so sad!.Then the hardship to get a Recommendation letter..And dont forget.JPA is the same.I dont know what else.
I like to compare with others before me..It seems that it's lucky to get the chance of a lifetime.And It seems that, my lecturer got his PhD directly after his first degree.And this means that only once are you allowed to go to overseas.So i betta not push it.So thats what I thought now, anyways.
I still feel that life is about a savings account..and you know i betta not waste it..Cause i gotta save some for myself later..I don't wanna be in debt later in life and have to pay my life with it..(its all in my head)
Monday, January 20, 2003
Forgiven
Today i feel as so sad but still it was better i must say ..because M seemed in a way forgave me.. I feel lonely really lonely in that lab..with no one to really connect to..And i guess i have nothing to do.Thank God..for that ..for i am so afraid of what may come next..Im just preparing myself..preparing..preparing..for the best..Frankly I must say that I cant get along like buddies and chum with M..He's too different from me..and I guess that its best to left things as they are..Hes sometimes kinda forgiving..so, okay..
But still the fact of the matter is that ...I guess I'm gonna have to stride alone..chwe sonel dahakessemnida..do the best that you can ..that's what the koreans say.!
Today i feel as so sad but still it was better i must say ..because M seemed in a way forgave me.. I feel lonely really lonely in that lab..with no one to really connect to..And i guess i have nothing to do.Thank God..for that ..for i am so afraid of what may come next..Im just preparing myself..preparing..preparing..for the best..Frankly I must say that I cant get along like buddies and chum with M..He's too different from me..and I guess that its best to left things as they are..Hes sometimes kinda forgiving..so, okay..
But still the fact of the matter is that ...I guess I'm gonna have to stride alone..chwe sonel dahakessemnida..do the best that you can ..that's what the koreans say.!
Mon 20.1.03 It starts...
Starting masters isnt as easy as i thought it would be. In fact it isnt easy at all..There are a lot of hindrances to it.First of all, there isn't exactly a teacher to instruct us what to do and what not to do. And secondly, there are colleages to mingle with. Fine of you are one of them but of youre uniquely yourself..well things are gonna be quite a challege.
This is my 3rd week here in UM. and things have been going smoothly.so far..anyway. I'm here in the lab. The reason why i chose this particular supervisor is that he is one of the talented who has connections..Connections that are vital for my well being and my future. And once you got the right connections, thing will go smoothly. Mind you, i'm quite lucky to have a supervisor whos from Oxford..and graduated first class and a muslim all in one..Hes the type of really good in a way that he's really respectful and easy..I like that very much
Although i dont have my best friend with me anymore, D..I feel that it's one way or the other a good thing..because I need to grow. All this while if D's around then I'll be left out completely..
Starting masters isnt as easy as i thought it would be. In fact it isnt easy at all..There are a lot of hindrances to it.First of all, there isn't exactly a teacher to instruct us what to do and what not to do. And secondly, there are colleages to mingle with. Fine of you are one of them but of youre uniquely yourself..well things are gonna be quite a challege.
This is my 3rd week here in UM. and things have been going smoothly.so far..anyway. I'm here in the lab. The reason why i chose this particular supervisor is that he is one of the talented who has connections..Connections that are vital for my well being and my future. And once you got the right connections, thing will go smoothly. Mind you, i'm quite lucky to have a supervisor whos from Oxford..and graduated first class and a muslim all in one..Hes the type of really good in a way that he's really respectful and easy..I like that very much
Although i dont have my best friend with me anymore, D..I feel that it's one way or the other a good thing..because I need to grow. All this while if D's around then I'll be left out completely..
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